Vorg tech RSS feed

There's An App For That

goodladd — 2010-04-17T07:02:36-04:00

Man proposes via iPad, pushes boundaries of lameness.

Pardon my French

chrisdye — 2009-10-09T14:26:41-04:00

Canada's federal government has put its very useful Termium French-English dictionary on the web for free. It is great for technical expressions that you would not find in a regular dictionary.

Another way to find translations for technical expressions in English or French is to go to Google and type: "site:gc.ca" and then the expression. This will make Google show you all the pages on the Government of Canada website that use the expression. Almost everything the government publishes on the internet is translated, so once you have found your expression somewhere on a government website, click "Francais" at the top of the page to find out how the government translated it.

Not Freaky At All

vinny9 — 2009-10-02T08:05:54-04:00

Miltary creating remote-controlled cyborg insects

Koodo Mobile = Telus with less Sucks?

dustin — 2008-04-03T23:03:21-04:00

Koodo Mobile is a new low-cost brand of Telus Mobility. They seem to have some really good deals compared with what I'm paying - and I'm with Telus right now.

No system access fee, no activation fee, no contracts, per-second billing. This looks like a serious play by Telus to lower the costs of wireless service in Canada. Cool!

Now if they only supported the iPhone...

Relaunching as Vorg

dustin — 2008-03-08T04:54:58-05:00

Vorg is the new name for SillyTech. That's the software that my blog runs on, along with a bunch of other cool people.

The Tag Cloud shows what Vorg blogs about. Authors - tags are a powerful way of us becoming internet authorities on topics we care about. Highlights include the map blog, music blog, photo blog, video blog, art blog, Montreal blog, and Vancouver blog.

RSS feeds are being pumped out for individual tags, individual authors and the full Vorg.

The Funny Quote Database has an improved view!

Vorg is continuing its slow and steady growth. All feedback is welcome. Some more improvements are planned soon. Also, we're looking for a few good bloggers to join Vorg.

Why the name change? Running 2 entirely different websites both starting with Silly in their names wasn't working for me. I hope you like Vorg.ca as a domain, I think it's pretty awesome. I'm gradually putting URL redirects in place with the goal of minimizing loss of google mojo. Everything should be switched over in the next few days.

Social Networking and Business

Mirzipan — 2008-02-27T20:33:27-05:00

Janeane Garofalo is having (with Dana Gould, Paul Provenza, and maybe the ACLU) an exclusive event for a certain kind of person. It's Friday, free, and part of Vancouver's Comedyfest. All it takes is lining up (first come, first served) with a print-out of your MYSPACE profile.

Is this the sort of thing that Dave Pollard is talking about in his "how to save the world" blog item 10? Your previous link-love got me thinking about it, and I later found myself on the comedy show's page. How can web-based social networking and the business mindset be used and harmonized? Or is this simply cross-promotional corporate advertising on the web?

Why Does Sillytech Hate?

goodladd — 2007-10-17T12:56:51-04:00

It seems like a lot of people can't leave comments while logged in right now because of the spam filter. What gives, Dustin? I, for one, have a number of fictional dialogues between Amazon.com and One Metre Beer that I'm dying to get started.

BarCamp thoughts and photos

dustin — 2007-08-22T05:07:27-04:00

I attended another Vancouver edition of a BarCamp Unconference this past weekend. I missed the late-night and early morning parts, but everything I caught was a blast. Good sessions and good people.

In his wrap-up, Boris muses about the timing of things. I think the way to do it is to start in the morning, go through sessions during the day as happened, pause again for food/drinks/SuperHappy time around dinner, then move into less structured overnight hacking time. People might not end up sleeping over, but some would stay up late tinkering for sure.

I published my set of 70 BarCamp photos. I took it as an opportunity to try my hand at taking close-up shots of individual people. There were lots of interesting targets, and I got a number of shots that I'm really happy with. Good practice for my future paparazzi gigs...

Sillytech redesign

vorg tech — 2007-05-26T06:33:44-04:00

Sillytech has undergone a redesign. The goals were to eliminate all the boxes, and make things cleaner all around. If things look wacky, try refreshing your browser to get the new style.

What do you think?

Who Is The Girliest Sillytecher Of Them All?

goodladd — 2007-04-21T14:19:46-04:00

Has anyone seen this before?

The Gender Genie

Based on the work of some Israeli linguists, this algorithm looks at a chunk of text and guesses whether or not the author was male or female. In the original study it guessed correctly something like 90% of the time, though the web-based tool has a lower success rate.

A quick rundown of the blogs I tested:

Me - Consistently guessed male
Adrienne - Mostly guessed female, one false male guess
Budman - Consistently guessed female
Sean - Mostly guessed male, one false female guess

I'm not sure what this proves, apart from the fact that Budman apparently has a very feminine writing style.

Simplify my electronic life

Mirzipan — 2007-03-28T16:37:15-04:00

I need a new email program for Windows with both web and hard-drive accessibility (POP). Preferably it should be low in cost and glitches, and high in safety and awesomeness. Good enough? Any Thunderbird or Opera fans out there?

We are the machine

dustin — 2007-02-06T23:12:13-05:00

Here's a funky video: Web 2.0 ... The Machine is Us/ing Us.

Photos in the sidebar

dustin — 2006-11-17T06:54:42-05:00

I updated the sidebar to include a random photograph on each page. The pictures are selected from the Sillytech Pool on flickr. Everyone is welcome to join the group and add their best photos to be included.

This is just one of the many great features that flickr provides. If you own a digital camera and you want to share photos online then go sign up with flickr. It's free (with a monthly upload limit) and awesome!

Vote for your favourite blag*

Mariana — 2006-11-15T12:05:22-05:00

Canadian Blog Awards.

Both Sillytech and Without Annette are up in a lot of the same categories, because I'm an idiot (but an idiot who cares). Still though, voting is anonymous and you can show your favourite wobsite* some love.

*not a typo.

Praise like you should

Mariana — 2006-10-01T22:11:11-04:00

So apparently there are Canadian Blog Awards.

Go nominate some blogs you like.

I've taken the liberty of entering this fine blog, and Without Annette, in a few different categories. Voting begins November 15th, so I'll remind you then.

Sir Pixel-lot

goodladd — 2006-09-10T18:43:26-04:00

Gigapxl Project

=incredible digital photography, taken using 100lb cameras that capture between 4 and 6 thousand megapixels.

Dustin, I'll bet your Canon PowerShot SD600 doesn't seem so impressive anymore, does it?

Do The Robot

vinny9 — 2006-07-31T00:47:42-04:00

5 cool gadgets from Sony labs

Ok that is it!

Maryam — 2006-07-12T22:55:27-04:00

Ok so i am retarded with technology. that has been long established. But here is the problem. I use realpayer to play songs on my computer. The other day some people laughed and called me old school. i had no idea realplayer was "old". but the point is that whether or not it is hip, it i screwing with me. It shuts down randomly and randomly deletes song! I just went from having 606 songs to 534 songs. How did that happen? how am i supposed to get those songs back? This is so sad!

So my point is, what's the word on the street? what are all the technologically hip kids using these days to play songs on their computers? is it iTUnes? 'cause i have iTunes. is there anything more user/dumb friendly than iTunes?

Multiple category tags per post

dustin — 2006-06-26T01:44:07-04:00

I upgraded the category system on my blog. Posts can now be put in multiple categories. When posting there's a free-form text field where any category labels can be entered. This means that categories don't have to be pre-defined. This approach has been successful in a number of other websites, and has come to be known as tags (or 'tagging'). Eventually I'll make a nice tag cloud (like the one at flickr) to show the weight of each category in the total make-up of posts.

Hopefully it doesn't break anything (let me know if you notice something).

Pirate Parlance Preparation

chrisdye — 2005-09-11T13:33:14-04:00

International Talk Like a Pirate Day is but one week away, so you've all got a lot of work to do to get ready.

This website helps you perfect you pirate accent. Apparently, pirates were Newfies.

This site should help with vocabulary..

Top speed

johnny — 2004-12-13T03:14:16-05:00

Any one know how to calculate the top speed of a Dodge Dart 700HP 5 speed with a 0.71 overdrive 3.23 final drive.

Time fix

dustin — 2004-08-27T18:03:45-04:00

For the past while sillytech has been operating in a non eastern standard time. I think it is fixed now. This was posted at 6:03 PM eastern time. The posts before this one are off by 5 hours.

Even more changes

dustin — 2004-08-26T15:41:02-04:00

OK, so I felt like I was on a roll with sillytech and decided to continue with some more changes...

The categories have been sorted out, with all the skit-like ones being put back in and every category being made available to everyone. The categories are listed near the bottom of the sidebar on every page. There is also a 'Friends of Sillytech' list in the sidebar on every page. These are blogs or websites that I read regularly. I have mentioned some of them before, but I will try and introduce them all eventually. They are some good reading if you are bored. If you want to suggest a site to add toss me an email.

Also, when editing posts you can now change the Title and category.

Changes to sillytech

dustin — 2004-08-24T16:15:26-04:00

A few changes were made to sillytech today. The funkiest being:

Everything gets shown on the front page.
The most recent comments get displayed in the sidebar.

Fun with web stats

dustin — 2004-08-04T11:49:37-04:00

In July there were 2173 different search terms that brought people to some page on sillytech.com. For your enjoyment here are the top terms, anything that brought 10 or more visitors...

Search Term	Number Of Hits
canadian idle	54
free risk game	52
sillytech	48
moebius comic	44
skits	36
skit	36
stealth disco	35
dinsey	32
america sucks	31
gmail access	31
superclubvideotron	29
rap battle	26
mysql limit	26
sssssex	26
used computers montreal	25
explosion animations	23
shit fucking	22
penis vagina	21
explosion generator	20
muzac	19
man breast	18
steadycam	18
sidewalk art	18
risk game download	18
penguin batting	17
pass the on the left hand side	16
question answerer	16
sex man	15
pass the dutchie on the left hand side��	15
postal inspectors	15
fuck woman	15
free risk game download	15
better business bureau toronto	15
commercial parody	15
happy bunny quotes	14
ms sql limit	14
women s boobies	14
pink telephone	14
real-life sitcom setting of alice	13
the littlest hobo	13
javascript blog	13
vagina sex	13
risk game	12
better than shakespeare	12
condelisa rice	12
cool jesus	12
littlest hobo	12
free risk download	11
java humor	11
sex penis	10
open course ware	10
sillysoft lux serial	10
comedy skits	10
free risk games	10
os x virus	10

Left or right

dustin — 2004-03-05T10:32:30-05:00

Do you like the sidebar better on the left or on the right?

The things that bring people here

dustin — 2004-02-23T01:28:19-05:00

For your amusement I present below the full list of search phrases that have brought people to sillytech in the month of february...

Keyphrases used on search engines

�

1628 different keyphrases	Search	Percent
iron law of wages	75	2.5 %
sillytech	58	1.9 %
the littlest hobo	39	1.3 %
funny skits	34	1.1 %
comedy skits	31	1 %
littlest hobo	30	1 %
skit ideas	30	1 %
skits	28	0.9 %
moebius comic	27	0.9 %
dinsey	26	0.8 %
superbowl comercials	24	0.8 %
psychiatric ward	22	0.7 %
saddam jokes	21	0.7 %
superclubvideotron	21	0.7 %
sssssex	17	0.5 %
bird flu jokes	17	0.5 %
bedtime quotes	16	0.5 %
rap battle	16	0.5 %
pope breakdancers	15	0.5 %
short skits	14	0.4 %
dollaraclip	13	0.4 %
girly quotes	13	0.4 %
mad cow comedy	13	0.4 %
javascript blog	13	0.4 %
cool jesus	12	0.4 %
lsd art	11	0.3 %
pink telephone	11	0.3 %
body sketch	11	0.3 %
fake news	11	0.3 %
skit comedy	10	0.3 %
howard dean insane	10	0.3 %
boohbah	9	0.3 %
modest mouse float on	9	0.3 %
mad cow skit	9	0.3 %
talent show skits	9	0.3 %
float on modest mouse	9	0.3 %
csearch	9	0.3 %
100x100 pics	8	0.2 %
cinderella skit	8	0.2 %
setec astronomy	8	0.2 %
howard dean scream download	8	0.2 %
how to commit suicide	8	0.2 %
breakdancers pope	8	0.2 %
picture of trash	7	0.2 %
bar	7	0.2 %
fun with chemistry	7	0.2 %
snl skits	7	0.2 %
littlest hobo lyrics	7	0.2 %
howard dean is insane	7	0.2 %
exploding whales	6	0.2 %
funny skit	6	0.2 %
tamil tiger	6	0.2 %
nasa propaganda	6	0.2 %
trash picture	6	0.2 %
aristasia	6	0.2 %
janet jackson superbowl breast pic	6	0.2 %
crocodile hunter quotes	6	0.2 %
androgynous names	6	0.2 %
gladitorial combat	6	0.2 %
skits for talent shows	6	0.2 %
short funny skits	5	0.1 %
man breast	5	0.1 %
funniest skits	5	0.1 %
powerwheels	5	0.1 %
missnikki	5	0.1 %
how to write a chemistry skit	5	0.1 %
funny short skits	5	0.1 %
shit fucking	5	0.1 %
server side aggregator	5	0.1 %
imhotep pyramid	5	0.1 %
frodo has failed	5	0.1 %
conan tickets	5	0.1 %
panther cvs	5	0.1 %
weeeeeee	5	0.1 %
kids in the hall season 1 dvd	5	0.1 %
boobies	5	0.1 %
ghetto trash	5	0.1 %
morgue attendant	5	0.1 %
comedy skit	5	0.1 %
i am going to commit suicide	5	0.1 %
cidade de deus quotes	5	0.1 %
girly skits	5	0.1 %
modest mouse quotes	5	0.1 %
ghetto quotes	5	0.1 %
the adventures of gay he-man	4	0.1 %
snl land shark	4	0.1 %
hang on the box	4	0.1 %
bored games	4	0.1 %
janet jackson superbowl halftime pic	4	0.1 %
im going to commit suicide	4	0.1 %
free comedy skits	4	0.1 %
man breast feeding	4	0.1 %
here fishy fishy	4	0.1 %
rush limbaugh song	4	0.1 %
zombie jokes	4	0.1 %
superclubvidéotron	4	0.1 %
cnn	4	0.1 %
janet jackson superbowl pic	4	0.1 %
can men lactate	4	0.1 %
bryan walsh	4	0.1 %
anxiety dreams	4	0.1 %
server side rss aggregator	4	0.1 %
youth comedy skits	4	0.1 %
how to write a skit	4	0.1 %
the iron law of wages	4	0.1 %
lost actors	4	0.1 %
how google works	4	0.1 %
fake ad	4	0.1 %
season for loving	4	0.1 %
jesus miracle	4	0.1 %
montreal mob	4	0.1 %
robot dolls	4	0.1 %
exploding duck	3	0.1 %
what is the iron law of wages	3	0.1 %
breakdancers for pope	3	0.1 %
moses skit	3	0.1 %
effect of lsd	3	0.1 %
high school talent show contracts	3	0.1 %
anderson cooper	3	0.1 %
good skits	3	0.1 %
muzac	3	0.1 %
quotes crocodile hunter	3	0.1 %
easy skits	3	0.1 %
black and white pics of new york	3	0.1 %
woman breast feeding man	3	0.1 %
karl laggerfeld	3	0.1 %
canadian political blogs	3	0.1 %
pics of new york	3	0.1 %
gil browdy	3	0.1 %
peppermint spearmint cosmo	3	0.1 %
lambourghini marcielago	3	0.1 %
dry humping	3	0.1 %
windows sucks	3	0.1 %
cvs panther netinfo login	3	0.1 %
job interview skit	3	0.1 %
aikhenvald finnish	3	0.1 %
sit coms	3	0.1 %
comedy mad cow	3	0.1 %
political leanings test	3	0.1 %
canada political blog	3	0.1 %
can men lactate?	3	0.1 %
geeklove	3	0.1 %
quotes from homeless people	3	0.1 %
whales exploding	3	0.1 %
naked ballerinas	3	0.1 %
egyptian hyrogliphs	3	0.1 %
good comedy skit	3	0.1 %
restaurant skits	3	0.1 %
fun chemistry quotes	3	0.1 %
stealth disco	3	0.1 %
iron wages	3	0.1 %
8 page skits	3	0.1 %
lego maniac	3	0.1 %
earthlink-peoplepc-wssynd	3	0.1 %
i need some ribs	3	0.1 %
sleep cycles	3	0.1 %
100x100 pixel pics	3	0.1 %
confucius say	3	0.1 %
total eclipse of the heart skit	3	0.1 %
humor skits	3	0.1 %
spoof commercials	3	0.1 %
telephone skits	3	0.1 %
verdun connection	3	0.1 %
flashmob video	3	0.1 %
eclipse of the moon	3	0.1 %
dean smells	3	0.1 %
the weeeeeee song	3	0.1 %
michael jackson money trouble	3	0.1 %
skit shooting	3	0.1 %
restaurant skit	3	0.1 %
less porn	3	0.1 %
ideas for funny skits	3	0.1 %
lawyer commercials	3	0.1 %
funny skit ideas	3	0.1 %
laughing mad cow	3	0.1 %
canada s province	3	0.1 %
and weeeeeee	3	0.1 %
he-man homosexual	2	0 %
how to fall asleep on cocaine	2	0 %
politics quotes doublespeak	2	0 %
short n funny skits	2	0 %
market street san fransisco	2	0 %
if you are going to san fransisco lyrics	2	0 %
osx color ls	2	0 %
road trip quotes	2	0 %
benny hill quotes and jokes	2	0 %
cvs server mac	2	0 %
skits on being connected	2	0 %
skits on stealing	2	0 %
super sticky hand	2	0 %
what type are you dracula	2	0 %
comedy skit ideas	2	0 %
fashion skits	2	0 %
howard dean is crazy	2	0 %
mac os x panther cvs server	2	0 %
man suckling breast	2	0 %
fashion victims	2	0 %
fun with french	2	0 %
saddam hussein comedy skits	2	0 %
howard dean crazy clip	2	0 %
janet jackson breast superbowl pic	2	0 %
dean insane	2	0 %
iron law	2	0 %
screw you quotes	2	0 %
nexearch	2	0 %
party skits	2	0 %
howard dean smells	2	0 %
panther pserver	2	0 %
stfu daily show	2	0 %
test political leanings	2	0 %
british skits	2	0 %
iron of wages	2	0 %
homo erotic	2	0 %
mini skits	2	0 %
carve egyptian sarcophagus	2	0 %
lord of the rings skits	2	0 %
alexandra aikhenvald finnish	2	0 %
provigo	2	0 %
flashmob belgium	2	0 %
pics to colour	2	0 %
michael jackson mormon	2	0 %
mac os x cvs pserver	2	0 %
briefcase shoes armani suit	2	0 %
smallest waist	2	0 %
moonboy	2	0 %
a world without men	2	0 %
fashion skit	2	0 %
how to commit the perfect suicide	2	0 %
pics of cushions	2	0 %
sexydance	2	0 %
2004 superbowl comercials	2	0 %
hmmm hmmm	2	0 %
executive suit tie janitor	2	0 %
cvs panther pserver	2	0 %
interesting nudity	2	0 %
german trenchcoats	2	0 %
nature skits	2	0 %
exploding ducks	2	0 %
big fish quotes	2	0 %
truly funny	2	0 %
rss server side aggregator	2	0 %
adult breast feeding	2	0 %
a man sucking breasts of a women	2	0 %
how to write a comedy skit	2	0 %
webkr	2	0 %
businessman barefoot expensive suit	2	0 %
philipino girls	2	0 %
super decoder token ;	2	0 %
cinderella comedy skits	2	0 %
payforporn	2	0 %
ranking systems	2	0 %
businessman suit humiliated	2	0 %
2003 a dave odyssey	2	0 %
dog/webresults.htm	2	0 %
exploding whale	2	0 %
panther xinetd.d	2	0 %
funnyguy	2	0 %
3 person comedy skits	2	0 %
sars fashion	2	0 %
what the world thinks of america	2	0 %
raffle barrel	2	0 %
celcius to farenheight formula	2	0 %
sillytech.com	2	0 %
howard dean scream downloads	2	0 %
suicide skits	2	0 %
dead body in the morgue	2	0 %
mad cow laughing	2	0 %
jokes on bird flu	2	0 %
mac os x running cvs server	2	0 %
skits for talent show	2	0 %
snl quotes	2	0 %
dog skits	2	0 %
the littlest hobo lyrics	2	0 %
homeless people are bad	2	0 %
comic skits	2	0 %
comedy skits in tamil	2	0 %
french skits	2	0 %
two penguins typewriter	2	0 %
the season for loving	2	0 %
leave it to beaver skits	2	0 %
fun quotes about peanut butter and jelly	2	0 %
hingston hall change the name	2	0 %
random dude	2	0 %
leave it to beaver skit	2	0 %
moldy bread picture	2	0 %
robovacuum	2	0 %
pics of new york city	2	0 %
snl land shark skit	2	0 %
sug knight	2	0 %
skit ideas -christian	2	0 %
cvs panther password	2	0 %
php rss aggregator	2	0 %
farm skit	2	0 %
paul demaisonneuve	2	0 %
kids in the hall dvd season 1	2	0 %
set up cvs server	2	0 %
he-man homo	2	0 %
melicious	2	0 %
moonshine chemistry	2	0 %
ricardo iron law of wages	2	0 %
dustin moon	2	0 %
two men skits	2	0 %
random humor	2	0 %
one person skit	2	0 %
charlesbergeron	2	0 %
quotes about independent filmmaking	2	0 %
funny spoof skits	2	0 %
skit porno	2	0 %
do men lactate?	2	0 %
sooooooooooooo	2	0 %
mad tv submission	2	0 %
fashion file	2	0 %
take off your suit shirt	2	0 %
political blog canada	2	0 %
flakken	2	0 %
something blog fake ad	2	0 %
i hate bell	2	0 %
woman smelly feet	2	0 %
jeffery meek	2	0 %
humping her leg	2	0 %
ricardo s iron law of wages	2	0 %
write skits for comedy shows	2	0 %
fun in chemistry	2	0 %
midget skit	2	0 %
dinsey com	2	0 %
words to short skits	2	0 %
grim reaper sketches	2	0 %
chemistry skit	2	0 %
crocodile hunter crikey	2	0 %
cinderella - a skit	2	0 %
internet comedy writers	2	0 %
ghetto skits	2	0 %
pile of cocaine	2	0 %
wheelchair quicky 2	2	0 %
celebrity gossip blog	2	0 %
ben wyrosdick	2	0 %
learn how to do a rap battle	2	0 %
cvs server panther	2	0 %
snl mad cow skit	2	0 %
skit funny	2	0 %
lawyer skits	2	0 %
bindle stick	2	0 %
telephone sale	2	0 %
boardgame weblog	2	0 %
cvs panther passwd	2	0 %
kids in the hall season 1	2	0 %
paper doll	2	0 %
canadian political blog	2	0 %
what the world thinks about america or americans?	2	0 %
cygwin sucks	2	0 %
totally random	2	0 %
homeless people quotes	1	0 %
boohbah faq	1	0 %
picture of the symbol for capitalism	1	0 %
do man breast feed?	1	0 %
windows sucks ass	1	0 %
dracula and skit	1	0 %
no one ever said it would be so hard	1	0 %
random things that could happen	1	0 %
porno suckling	1	0 %
crazy politicians	1	0 %
why do people commite suicide	1	0 %
soccer skits	1	0 %
montreal fringe festival	1	0 %
wheelchair blog -ibot	1	0 %
http //sillytech.com/skits.php?page=9	1	0 %
battle blog rap	1	0 %
skit ideas comedy	1	0 %
funny teacher skits	1	0 %
jokes about bird flu	1	0 %
hair job interview	1	0 %
email contact of companies in qubec 2004	1	0 %
how to build an egyptian sarcophagus	1	0 %
old spice logo	1	0 %
skits for two men	1	0 %
dry humping story	1	0 %
scripts and skits	1	0 %
pics of mars sent by space probes	1	0 %
michael jackson jail skits	1	0 %
pictures of pigs with wings and halos	1	0 %
subtext skits	1	0 %
lovely autumn	1	0 %
funniest skit ever	1	0 %
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a javascript 'Blog This' bookmark

dustin — 2004-01-21T21:07:32-05:00

I made myself this little javascript statement and saved it as a bookmark. Now I just have to click it to be brought to the blog page here at sillytech with a link to the page I was at input into the textarea. Give it a try on your end if you want. Just create a bookmark/favorite and paste this (all on one line) into the URL part of the bookmark. Javascript is pretty severely different across browsers, so let me know if it doesn't work.

javascript:window.location='http://sillytech.com/write.php?intro_textarea=
';

a PHP or PERL regular expression to make links out of URLs

dustin — 2004-01-20T23:40:35-05:00

I just spent the last little while writing this virtuously verbose line of code. It does a search and replace using PERL regular expression syntax from PHP. (Note that the line breaks should be removed for it to work):

$post = preg_replace('/(?mi)([^"\'])((http|ftp):\/\/
([_a-zA-z0-9\-]+\.)+[_a-zA-z0-9\-]{2,5}(\/[_a-zA-z0-
9\-\.~]*)*(\?[_a-zA-z0-9\-\.~&=;]*)?)/', '\1"\2">\2', " ".$post );

It's effect it to turn a fully qualified URL (i.e. something that starts with http://) into a link. For example http://test.com. It has to be so complex because there is a large variety in what URLs look like. For example ftp://somethinglong.foo.co.nz/blah-goo/~filter.shtml?t&a=good is a perfectly valid URL and should therefore be linked as one. Feel free to try and stump it by giving some wacked out URLs.

It will work in comments as well.